Sad Reality

How your memory hurts
It hurts not to see you
Not kiss you,
Not touch you
You are so far yet your memory haunts me
I would like to search for you
Yet I know any search would be in vain
My time has passed 

As a shooting star passes I make a wish
I ache for it to take me to you
I want to feel your skin
Your kisses on my lips
I miss the way you gently bit them
I miss the sound of your voice yet its echo remains

I do not care if the whole world knows how I feel
Who cares if they know I am dying for you
That without you my life feels empty
Let them criticize
Let them judge me
What shame is there when one's heart is in love?
Isn't love a gift from above?

With you absent it's gift is nothing but a curse
I am but a lonely soul
A walking dead
Hoping to once more wrap my arms around you
Never letting you go

There are so many things I would like to tell you 
So many dreams I built around "us"
Without you my heart has no purpose
Nothing but a machine keeping me alive

Without you, all I want to do is die
My life without you is but a sad joke
I ache to see you dance for me
Gentle and wild 
Night and day
Fire and ice
 
Just thinking of you makes my heart beat faster
Words I did not say, now crowd my soul
Demanding to be let out 
Demanding to be expressed 
Screaming to be heard by the one I love

Your innate sensual nature has captivated every inch of me
I yearn to see your brown eyes once more
I yearn to be lost in their magical enigma
Losing myself again in them for hours 
Hours which seemed like seconds 
Seconds which felt like an eternity

My fears were drowned every time you held me
In your arms I knew I was safe
Wretched me who did not cherished your spirit
Now I am lost and confused
A dying man searching for the one I let go

A coward was I when I let you walk away 
I can still hear your muffled cries
I remember when you said "no one else will take my place"

A rollercoaster you are
Joy and desperation
Happiness and pain
Harmony and Chaos 
Oh how I miss our liaisons!

You are proof of God's existence
You helped me find myself
You are the reason I said goodbye to my ego
But am I too late?
Do you even care?
Do I cross you mind?
Do you wish you were still mine?

I miss you a lot
Your absence hurts 
My heart stopped beating the day you left
 
Without prior notice you took a part of me 
Now I live suffering
My soul demands an explanation for your absence
It cannot accept you are no longer here
All I can do is think you, driving myself crazy 
Making it harder to accept you are never coming back


I would like to forget you
Yet your memory is embedded in my very blood
I now drown in my tears
A pain so deep is hard to bare

I have so many unanswered questions
Yet there is only this wretched reality... 
I love you
I miss you
I would walk hundredths of roads to find you
You are my reason for living
Yet today I'm dying...